Growing Up

What I really want to know is when does a person actually start to feel like a grown-up? As a kid I remember looking at the grown-ups and thinking they were like an alien life form. They had all the answers, knew exactly what needed to be done next, and they were always responsible. I couldn't imagine being like them. Still can't. Here I am in my mid 30's, and I still don't know what I'm doing. I have experiences under my belt and deep abiding faith that the Lord is in control (and I'm not). But every day I have to make decisions, and the fact of the matter is that I really don't know if I'm making the right choices half the time. Am I being a good mom? What if I'm really getting it all wrong when I think I'm doing okay? What does the future hold? I have not one clue. Life changes so unexpectedly. I look at people who are my parents' age and I see them in a similar way that I used to see that same generation 25 years ago. The seem to have it all together and have found all the answers. But how can that be true when here I am--an adult--and I still feel like a kid in a bigger and achier body. When will I finally feel grown up? At this rate it will be long after I'm dead.